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England
I live and work amongst older people in an Anglican charity established in 1674 for the relief of the elderly poor. The site embraces a parish church, a study centre and a church primary school. I have become increasingly concerned about the place of older people both within church and society, believing that we marginalise and dis-empower them. Our prejudices or fears surrounding old age shape our social, theological and economic responses to those members of our community whom we should learn to celebrate and value.
I was born in a small village in the north east of England where my parents lived opposite my grandmother and great grandmother. As a family, all generations shared in the care and support of children and all our lives were richer because of it. This small community was stable because it was a place where all belonged. It was a place where older people were valued and enabled to participate because they lived and died alongside others. They were given time and respect. At my local church older and younger people worshipped together. I learned the faith at the knees of older women who devoted their time to afternoon Sunday school teaching; who encouraged and embraced young people mindful of their needs. This was, I now see on reflection, an inter-generational community where age was both important and irrelevant! In my middle years I am so grateful for these older people and I still harvest what they shared.
I have come to see the importance of building up a community that gives an intentional value to older people. We should not isolate or segregate them but always seek to find ways of valuing who they are and what they have to offer. This is especially important in our congregations where older people are so often dismissed as yesterday’s people. Older people are powerful evangelists and in many respects they are the churches’ natural spiritual constituency. When we talk of the family, let us embrace every member regardless of hair colour, physical strength or economic productivity.
Our vision of older people is important. I believe that our faith should enable us not to collude with the attitudes that teach us to abhor ageing and exalt youth over all else. We need a vision of ageing that helps people to grow older with grace. Our tradition affirms the interconnectedness of spirit, mind and body and one of the opportunities that growing older brings is to attend to the living spirit and the essential role the numinous plays in the life of older people.
So we should ask ourselves: what is our theology and vision of ageing? How can older people help us enlarge our spiritual wisdom for living?
Finally one of the things that most distresses me about ageing is the woeful lack of pastoral sensitivity about the ageing process. Can we make opportunities to learn alongside older people about their hopes and fears, their joys and burdens? As people expect to live longer, do we understand their physical and spiritual challenges? In this respect specialist places like my foundation can work with others in promoting the nature of well-being in old age and encouraging people to work together for the older person. We can also offer community for those who are isolated by family or circumstance.
I hope that when we reflect on the family, older people will always be part of our thinking and practice.
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